I have a take on this! "What is Self?" I think it's different from IFS but also compatible. Curious how it dovetails with all of @xuenay's sequences building up IFS from scratch (which I admit I have not thoroughly read) (IFS = Internal Family Systems)
Self as a selfing function among parts
18 tweets · November 2020 · 67 likes · 2 retweets · read on Twitter
What is Self? I like to think of it as a "selfing function". Since you only have one body and one mouth and one "attention" in some sense, *somehow* your system needs to answer the question of "what do I do, say, and think about or attend to?" Different parts generate candidates.
Different parts generate candidates, but something has to perform some sort of aggregation & selection function, and my take is that that *something* is not a "part" in the same sense as other brain modules being "parts". Maybe a different kind of part? Or maybe more emergent…🤔
Maybe I'm just literally defining "part" as the things that generate candidates and "selfing function" as the thing that selects. That seems about right, actually. Note: "self" in this sense is wider than IFS Self, in that something necessarily must always be performing this fn
However, it is common for it to be performing it quite poorly, which looks like stuckness or oscillation because conflicting urges are unable to be reconciled. Perceptual Control Theory describes these dynamics in depth.
One image I have found very evocative (tho way anthropomorphized) is of the Self sitting at a desk and getting constant inputs from parts, who are coming up and delivering verbal reports as well as folders of information and so on, and they're relating to these parts.
Common, dysfunctional Self is overwhelmed and feels victimized by parts. It expresses irritation at what seems to it like irrelevant or false information (eg coming from emotional flashbacks). A kind of "you should know better", but no adequate explanation of why.
Can also have Self that has an appreciative stance. Imagine them saying "yes, thank you", "great, I'll have a look", "oh, false alarm but thanks for letting me know". And if conflicting or surprising info, a curious orientation, assuming the confused part was missing vital info.
(Seems plausible to me that these two general approaches might correspond to left & right hemisphere somehow, although there's obviously way more going on than that. But frustration is very LH-characteristic, and RH is way better at holding conflicting perspectives comfily…🤔💭)
Another image I've had is of my Self being like a dad, & all of my thoughts being kind of like kids clamoring for attention… there's a sense of like, I can't read each kid's favorite story at the same time, but I *do* actually have enough *love* for all of my kids at once!
And importantly, I can communicate my limits/boundaries/choices/etc to my kids in a way that makes them feel bad for even asking for attention, or in a way that dignifies them and appreciates their desire & request. I've been learning to shift this in relation to my thoughts!
Same day I first realized this, I was musing under my breath about something, and my attention trailed off, and I was like "or whatever the hell I was talking about" then I was like "wait—no. NOT whatever the hell. that thought was sacred, even if I'm choosing not to explore it."
I've been talking about this stance with @pjeby lately and he thinks that this is absurd because the brain is software and not deserving of respect (nor disrespect), but I feel like I can now point more precisely at what I mean, here.
I don't know that much about machine learning, but I know a little. I also don't know that much about neuroscience & neurochemistry, but I know a little. It seems to me that the two stances above probably have a distinct neurochemical signature and the loving one learns better.
Without claiming much specifically, I would say that this almost certainly has something to do with serotonin, as evidenced by: • neuroplasticity anti-correlated with depression • REBUS model that talks about better brain communication on psychedelics (serotonin system)
What is serotonin's deal, anyway? These words I came up with as attempts to pithily evoke it sound suspiciously like the Core States one gets to in Core Transformation 🧐
The image QT'd just above talks about high serotonin as being "secure high status". I suspect <whatever that looks like for you> is the spacious & integrative IFS Self, more so than your preconception of what "talk to yourself lovingly" implies.
Okay, long enough thread for now! I've got an existential dance party to rock out at 💃🤸♂️ As always, it's important to remember that the desk & dad metaphors above aren't literally true, because of homunculus issues. But the thing they evoke seems central to what Self is, to me.